Title: Caribbean Cruise Crime
Contest #: 10, The Great Caribbean Escape
Pairing: Haruhi x Hikaru if you squint real hard but generally, Haruhi x Host Club
Disclaimer: I don’t own Ouran and Conan, Ran and Sonoko are Case Closed/ Detective Conan characters!
Summary: Kidnapped by the twins to go on a VIP caribbean cruise, Haruhi finds herself to be an obsessed stalker’s target.
Author’s Notes: I’m not entirely sure this is a valid entry since this is far from a oneshot but nevertheless, I am posting this story due to a rather insistent plot bunny inspired by this LJ’s contest. 889 words! Enjoy! Review! Review! Review!
“Mother in heaven, I don’t know how things have ended up like this but..” Haruhi closed her eyes as she continued her inner monologue, “But I’ve been spirited away to a Caribbean cruise ship with only the clothes on my back!”
“Haru-chan, daijoubu?” exclaimed Honey-senpai as he poked the despondent freshman. Mori-senpai merely shook his head and steered the blond towards the restaurant.
Two arms wrapped around her shoulders and a vein ticked angrily on her forehead. She took a deep breath, telling herself that her dreams of becoming a great lawyer would turn to ashes if she gave in to homicidal tendencies but after kidnapping her and dumping her on this ship, the twins had some nerve to touch her! “Teme! I should just turn you two into fish bait!” exclaimed Haruhi, glaring at Hikaru and Kaoru who both wore cheeky grins. A dramatic gasp came from behind her.
“Okaa-san! Haruhi is using foul language!” shrieked Tamaki as Kyoya merely pushed his glasses up his nose. His calm eyes missed nothing, from an angry Haruhi to the twins who wore insolent smiles to Tamaki who was growing hysterical from being ignored. “Does this count as kidnapping?” Kyoya thought idly as he quickly came up with a solution to a problem that hasn’t even begun.
“Haruhi, I know you’re shocked that you’re suddenly on this cruise,” began Kyoya, “And the twins didn’t even ask if you were afraid of heights when they pulled you unto the helicopter to get here but with all things in consideration, you might as well spend your summer here and work off half of your debt,” finished Kyoya.
“Half?” she echoed, her mind quickly computing.
Kaoru smiled as he added, “This cruise is only for the fabulously wealthy so Kyoya could charge more than triple of the usual fee for escort and conversation.”
Haruhi’s eyes twinkled, “Triple?”
Hikaru grinned and said, “The buffet is also open 24/7 to guests so you can eat your fill of ootoro and stuff.”
Her smile bloomed, blinding everyone in its brilliance. “I’ll do my best!” said Haruhi as all the other Host club members grinned.
“What was the blinding light back then Sonoko?” asked Ran her companion as they roamed the ship along with Conan.
Conan tugged on Ran’s skirt as if to call her attention, when in fact, he was discreetly trying to pull the hemline lower because there were guys ogling the girl’s legs. “Geez! This girl is completely oblivious to her own looks!” gripped Conan mentally. “Ran-neechan, Sonoko-neechan is staring at that group of people over there,” as he pointed at Suoh’s group. He recognized some of the people there, particularly Kyoya. His eyes widened when he saw Haninozuka Mitsukine and Morinozuka Takashi join the group. Ran gasped.
“Honey-senpai!” exclaimed Ran, drawing the attention of Tamaki who immediately sparkled and waltzed his way to her. A red rose was presented to her as she found herself looking at the princely blond.
“Princess, your face is infinitely more enchanting than that of the sea,” delivered Tamaki smoothly, successfully wrenching a blush from the usually oblivious girl. Tamaki noted that the little boy beside the girl made an “Eeh?” of surprise and disgruntlement. Tamaki’s eyes gleamed as he milked his phermones. He handed the rose and caught her in an embrace and dipped her. “Your beauty would put mermaids to shame!”
“Tamaki, I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” said Mori.
“Tama-chan, Ran-chan is the regional karate champion so be nice,” Honey admonished.
“EHHH?” exclaimed the Host Club members even as Conan kicked Tamaki’s shin and Ran smoothly extricated herself from his grasp.
“Wow, that’s the first time I’ve seen another girl besides Haruhi purposely escape the lord’s clutches,” whispered Kaoru.
Kyoya began scribbling on his notebook as he spoke, “Ran Mori is one of the best female fighters in Japan and her father, Kogorou Mori is the famous detective who solves those high profile crimes.” Amidst sounds of awe from Tamaki, Haruhi and the twins, Kyoya added, “She’s just a commoner though.”
Haruhi, Conan and Ran all face-faulted at Kyoya’s comment. A sweat-drop appeared on Ran’s head as she chuckled good-naturedly. Conan sneered as he said, “Based on my deductions, you guys are from Ouran High School. The one wearing glasses judging from his appearance is probably an Ootori and since the main family has three sons, you’re most likely the youngest, Kyoya Ootori I presume?”
Amidst dropping jaws, he continued, “Part of the reason why I think you’re from Ouran is that, first, you all look like bored rich boys and most likely you’re members of some dumb club like cosplay or hosting.” At that, Tamaki was again reduced to tears. Conan sighed before going on, “The blond guy is your president because you did nothing to stop him from making a fool of himself over Ran but you rescued him in time from getting his ass kicked by Ran who might’ve been offended by his groping.”
“Offended?” wailed Tamaki as lightning bolts struck him.
Kyoya pushed his glasses up as he did a rapid reassessment.
The twins were laughing as Honey distracted Ran.
Haruhi leaned down and looked straight into Conan’s eyes as she said, “You’re not just a kid, are you?”
It was now Conan’s turn to gulp and stutter.